Excelsior Springs Weekly Horoscopes – November 3-9, 2025
Brought to you by Molly Roberts Studio and Metaphysical, 253 E Broadway, downtown Excelsior Springs
Wine tastings, hayrides, and karaoke therapy — must be another week in Excelsior Springs. Your horoscope is here to tell you which event to blame your life choices on.
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Aries, you’ll start strong at Team 5k Running Group, sprinting like someone promised free wine at the finish line. By Friday night, you’re at The Rage Cave, yelling at a bucket of drywall about your “personal growth.” It’s called balance.
Cosmic Tip: You can’t win Bowling for Rotary by tackling pins. Try it anyway.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Taurus, your soul says “peace and mindfulness,” but your calendar screams “Reindeer Candle Class” and “Wine Tours.” The stars say: lean in. After all, you’re basically the zodiac’s comfort candle—warm, reliable, and a little too scented.
Cosmic Tip: Happy Hour at The Candle Bar counts as aromatherapy if you sniff your drink first.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
Gemini, you’ll bounce from Open Mic Night to Karaoke at The Eagles to Mid-Day Mic like a caffeinated troubadour. No one’s stopping you because, honestly, they can’t find you long enough to try.
Cosmic Tip: You’ll tell three different people you’re “on a mindfulness journey” while double-fisting drinks at Shamrock Hills.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
Cancer, you’re all about emotions this week—crying at Making Peace, weeping during Energy Healing, and maybe shedding a tear at Elkhorn Day when your sandwich hits the floor. It’s fine. You’re a water sign. Hydration = healing.
Cosmic Tip: The Ladies Day at Church of Christ is your Super Bowl. Bring tissues.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Leo, it’s your time to shine at Karaoke Night and absolutely no one’s surprised. You’ll also attend the Museum Benefit Dinner just for the spotlight when they dim the lights.
Cosmic Tip: At Sunset Hayride Tastings, resist performing “Let It Go” unless asked. You will be asked.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Virgo, you’re double-booked with PTO meetings, Fitness Classes, and Shredding Events—because even your chaos is alphabetized. By Saturday, you’ll be stress-knitting during BYOC Crafting Day while side-eyeing anyone with glitter.
Cosmic Tip: You’ll attend Museum Dinner purely to judge their seating chart.
Libra (September 23 - October 22)
Libra, you’ll try to find harmony between Drum Fit, Wine Tours, and Smashing Opportunities at The Rage Cave. The stars call that “balance through destruction.”
Cosmic Tip: Your charm will land you extra breadsticks at Donnici’s Elkhorn Day—a small but meaningful victory.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
Scorpio, between Energy Healing, Karaoke, and Wine Cave Tours, you’ll experience every human emotion plus two new ones science hasn’t named yet.
Cosmic Tip: Someone at Open Game Night will challenge you. Destroy them. It’s in your nature.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Sag, you’re unstoppable: Wine Tours, Hayrides, Auctions—you’re like a roaming party on legs. You’ll yell “YOLO!” at Trolley Wine Tours even though no one’s invited you on the trolley.
Cosmic Tip: At the Quarter Auction, you’ll accidentally start a bidding war over something you don’t understand.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
Cap, your week is a well-oiled machine: Hospital Meetings, PTO Agendas, Fitness Classes, and a strategically scheduled Wine Tasting to cope. Everyone else is spinning; you’re thriving.
Cosmic Tip: You don’t have to run the town, Capricorn. But if you do, at least delegate the snacks at the next meeting.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
Aquarius, you’ll attend Energy Healing with Jordan, New Freedom Recovery, and Ladies Day—and somehow still end up debating alien ethics at The Atlas Saloon by midnight. It’s fine. You’re on brand.
Cosmic Tip: You’ll invent a new dance move at Drum Fit and call it “The Cosmic Vibe.”
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
Pisces, between Toddler Swim, Mindfulness Yoga, and Guided Winery Tours, you’re basically floating through town like a relaxed goldfish with a wine habit. Everyone else is jealous.
Cosmic Tip: At Open Mic, sing like no one’s watching—because they’ve all gone to refill their drinks.
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