Excelsior Springs Weekly Horoscopes – December 15-21, 2025
Brought to you by Molly Roberts Studio and Metaphysical, 253 E Broadway, downtown Excelsior Springs
Whatever you do this week: run, sip, swim, sing, craft, or cry happily at moonlight, Excelsior Springs is your stage. Let your cozy hometown and quirky adventures be your spark. Enjoy!
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
You’ll kick off the week at the Team 5k Running Group, powered entirely by holiday adrenaline and poor decision-making. By Friday, you’ll be smashing things at Rage Cave because apparently cardio wasn’t enough.
Cosmic Tip: If you sprint through the Hall of Trees, at least pretend you’re admiring them.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
You are spiritually aligned with Fence Stile Igloos and will refuse to leave once seated. Cold weather? Never heard of her.
Cosmic Tip: Pair Happy Hour at The Candle Bar with zero plans afterward. This is called self-care.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
You’ll bounce between Open Mic Night, Casual Commander Magic, and Murder at the Country Club, fully committing to none and narrating all of it.
Cosmic Tip: At Casa Di Vite Chess Club, stop giving unsolicited commentary. The board does not need a podcast.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
You will cry at Miss Ramsey’s Little Artists Club, again at Holiday in Whoville, and once more while walking through the Hall of Trees “just one last time.”
Cosmic Tip: Writing Santa a thank-you note counts as emotional regulation.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
You will enter Fence Stile Igloos like it’s your own holiday photoshoot. There will be posing. There will be lighting critiques.
Cosmic Tip: If you sing at Open Mic Night, remember: louder isn’t always better. (It is for you, though.)
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
You’ll attend Medication Mix-Ups: Don’t Let Santa Double-Dose You! and silently judge everyone who didn’t bring a notebook.
Cosmic Tip: At BYOC Crafting Day, not every project needs improvement. Let chaos live.
Libra (September 23 - October 22)
You can’t choose between Mid-Week Recharge Yoga, Movement & Mindful Yoga, and Energy Healing, so you’ll float between all three and achieve… mild confusion.
Cosmic Tip: Pick one. Or don’t. Indecision is your brand.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
You’ll be intensely focused during Murder at the Country Club, immediately accusing everyone and absolutely being wrong.
Cosmic Tip: If someone annoys you, Rage Cave is cheaper than bail.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
You’ll casually stroll into Holiday in Whoville, stay for five minutes, then somehow end up at Donnici’s Car Show making new friends.
Cosmic Tip: Saying “I’ll just pop in” is a lie you tell yourself every week.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
You will treat City Council like a sport, mentally awarding points. Later, you’ll critique the layout of the Hall of Trees like it’s a project proposal.
Cosmic Tip: Relax at Christmas Dinner and Dance Party. No one is auditing the waltz.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
This week transforms you into a festive mystic: Energy Healing, Candle Pour Parties, and possibly debating symbolism at Hall of Trees.
Cosmic Tip: Not everything needs deeper meaning. Sometimes it’s just a really nice candle.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
You’ll be emotionally overwhelmed at Meet Santa and Toy Drive, nostalgic at Home School Swim, and dreamy during Live Music at Fence Stile.
Cosmic Tip: Crying into hot cocoa is still hydration.
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